


If You Need Me, I Am Here

by elebuu



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Cid is a sweetheart, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-09-28
Packaged: 2018-08-18 07:17:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8153620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elebuu/pseuds/elebuu
Summary: She feels like she can't tell a soul--but there's someone who supports her unconditionally.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written with a friend in mind. <3
> 
> Recommended BGM: https://youtu.be/rUzxvmK5svA

The sky overhead gleamed with the spill of astral droplets, silver against the curtain of night. She could tell the air was still, or nearly; the only wind that fluttered round her head was that of the breeze stirred in by the flight path of the ship. She looked out over the bannister of the craft, and wondered what she ought to say.

“You’re awfully stoic tonight, old friend.” She turned her head towards the sound of Cid’s voice, and found him craning his neck around to look over his shoulder at her, his large hands still fixed upon the wheel. He wore a smile she found uncharacteristically enigmatic of him. “Oh. It’s nothing, really.” A lie. She thought she must be very unskilled at it, though, for he locked the wheel in with both hands, stepping off the control platform, and began to walk carefully toward her.

“I’ve been taking to worrying about you even more than usual, lately.”  
            She laughed. “You shouldn’t…” But he only shook his head, slowly and deliberately. When he opened his eyes, they were steady and almost forbidding, in the way an immense open sky would be. “I won’t pry. But I do know what you look like when you are carrying a burden built for two.” The corners of his mouth pulled into a fragile smile that creased the edges of his eyes. “Whatever you would care to say tonight stays here aboard the _Enterprise_. Here—if it might change your mind, may I be the first to confess something?”

His words surprised her, and she studied him with great suspicion for several moments. Then, in her stiff and dutiful way, she nodded once.

The smile folded, his brow knitting, the creases around his eyes melting into soft sorrow. “You frighten me. Though I’ve never once doubted you would succeed at whatever you put your mind to, as soon as I watch you go, I’m… terrified. Oft just for an instant, but terrified nonetheless, that that moment will be the last time I see you.”

She was shocked. Her head spun; what should she say? What _could_ she say to that? There was nothing inside her to comfort him, and she felt suddenly helpless. “Ah—I—forgive me, I didn’t mean to place that on your shoulders. I only—“ Her despair was interrupted just then by a quick surge of humour. He never stumbled quite like this with her. In spite of herself, she found laughter coming from her chest and out her mouth.

Cid looked anxious. She finally felt her defenses crumple, and her soft laughter began to take up a flow of tears. They pooled in her eyelashes and curved down the sides of her nose, tiptoeing off her cheeks, droplets gathering in the folds of her cowl and hitting the deck with sounds too quiet to hear against the purr of the engine. She was still smiling, and the contrast twisted her stomach into knots. “I’m sorry,” she breathed, a chuckle stealing the air from her lungs. “I thought I shouldn’t. Nobody needs to hear what’s bothering me. I’m supposed to be the hero, remember?” The next time she laughed, it cracked and turned into a sob.

She never saw him walk closer to her. It was while her eyes were still closed, clamped tight in the thin guise of regaining her composure, that she felt it. A firm _thump_ , and a strength and warmth surrounding her shoulders. When she opened her eyes again, and the trail of water freed her vision, she was looking at the lapels of his coat. She tried to look up, but found that one of her temples had a chin resting on it.

“Nonsense.” His voice was a touch coarser than before. “Gods, I’ve been worried sick,” he sighed in the same timbre, sounding oddly relieved. “I swear it—if you want to speak with someone about what’s heavy on your shoulders, you can speak with me.” Her eyes felt glazed over, soaked. She was standing stiff as a marble figurine; as if in reply, she felt his arms tighten around her.

She caved, sinking into his chest, letting tears wash over them both. “I’m not supposed to—I’m—“ She breathed in deeply. He smelled like warm metal and polished wood; a little of petrichor; and faintly, as well, of smoke from the firing of aether pistons. She ached and ached. _All right…_

“…I don’t know if I can keep fighting like this. I’ve tried everything, and I’m so tired… I’m so tired, and I wonder sometimes if there is any hope that someday I won’t have to fight like this anymore…” A fresh coat of dew stung her eyelids. The words were rushing out of their prisons. Cid loosened his grip just a little bit, allowing one of his hands to settle at the back of her head. He traced his thumb through her hair, wrapping his arms around her, tenderly pulling her head to his chest. She felt his nose nudge the top of her head.

“I’m not the worse at all for your telling. I only deeply regret that you’ve felt this way.” She sank and sank as he spoke. “How about you don’t hide it all away from now on, eh?” A warm chuckle ran through it. “Even heroes need someone to lend an ear now and then.”

“Now,” he continued, pulling away just enough to look her in the eyes again. His were deep blue windows into a sturdy, scrappy kind of optimism; it was perfect for him. “Truthfully I don’t know how to tell you to fix up all the world’s struggling—can’t even think of anything clever to say that might make you believe in it, in fact.” She whimpered. “Just know—if it mean anything to you to know it—I will always believe in your victory. You’re bloody invincible, you know that?” He beamed at her. “Please, from now on. I’m not awake as late as I used to be every night, but I am at the ready. Remember—I said I would be anything you need me to be!”

“And you meant it…”

“Aye, I did, and still do.”

She breathed out the last of the anguish that choked her.

They lived in a scarred and terrible world, yes. At that moment, however, they were two souls aloft in the endless night, no past and no future brighter to them than the pearly light of the moon and stars. No clearer or more true than what they could say to one another.


End file.
